And Another One...

>> 27 June 2013

Do marital blues have seasons, too? 

I just had a conversation via phone with a good friend. She too is having marital problems. Her husband is on a jealousy streak over a mutual guy-friend of ours. 

Here's my take:

A husband usually doesn't let another man get into his skin if he isn't uncomfortable with the idea of his wife having a very intimate friendship  with another man. So maybe it would be best to reflect first on ones actuation to better understand where the other person is coming from. 

Think, are you giving him reasons to doubt?  Because spending more time with others than with him and your family would surely send a red-light signal to your hubby. 

So my advice would be,

1. Manage your time well. This is so you won't sacrifice family quality time with the time you have to spend with your self, your craft or other point of interests. This is because while marriage is a commitment, it isn't a cage. One is not supposed to give up his/her individuality because one marries. That is why married couple are commanded to nurture eachother's likeness and respect eachother's differences.

2. Talk with your husband. If he really has nothing to worry with your friendship with others, then let him understand that.  Nurse the bruised ego. Reassure him that you love him . An open-line of communication usually does the trick.

3. Be constant. Do not be preoccupied with atypical things that you forget to put your family first. Remember, Family Comes First. Having said that, learn to know your limits and be constant with it. Reflect reflect din pag may time :D


As an end note, The Family Code had given married couples a guide in their obligation to one another.

Art.68: The husband and wife are obliged to live together, observe mutual love, respect and fidelity, and render mutual help and support.


God Blesses A Family that Prays Together. 





-mcm

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The Day Before You Lyrics

>> 17 June 2013

I had all but given up on finding
The one that I could fall into
On the day before you
I was ready to settle for
Less than love and not much more
There was no such thing as a dream come true
Oh, but that was all the day before you

Now you're here and everything's changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I will never have to go back to
The day before you

In your eyes I see forever
Makes me wish that my life never knew
The day before you

Oh, but Heaven knows those years without you
Were shaping my heart for the that day I found you
If you're the reason for all that I've been through
Then I'm thankful for the day before you

Now you're here and everything's changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I will never have to go back to
The day before you

Was the last day that I ever needed alone
And I'm never going back
No I'm never going back

Now you're here and everything's changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
No I'm never going back
I will never have to go back to
The day before you

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An Hour of Need

Had a conversation with a High school friend earlier via Facebook. We went through the usual "kumustahan". It was then that she opened up and told me about the pain she is going through now. Apparently, she is having a very serious marital woe. Her husband sends her and her kids (two) out of their family home. And as it happens, he did so because of a third party.

So, the good-for-nothing guy turned his back on his wife and his own flesh and blood because of another girl. No wonder, my friend was beside herself. (This I understand.) As it turned out, she had made Facebook her own  battleground  and had posted a series of hate-statuses against the alleged third party.(This I don't agree.)

She asked for my advise and basically, what I had given her can be summed up in 5 words. 


PRAY

A lot of things that happens to us, we don't understand. Why? because our wisdom is but limited. The antidote then is to seek God's wisdom. My friend has many "whys". Most of it I can't answer. But I know My God can. So I told her, to fall on her knees and ask God herself. Would He answer? Of course He would. He does. He never fails to do.You just need to Ask.

Jesus loves conversations. He is the best listener and friend one can ask. So whenever you are troubled. Whenever you feel like no one on earth would be able to understand you. Don't fear. Because Someone high above has our back. He is the 24/7 friend we all want to have. Seek him zealously!

TRUST

God's plans are unknown to us. Usually we just guess it, and pray that our plans are in accordance to His. But God's purposes are, as I beg to disagree with most of you, NOT unfathomable. They are actually all logical. This is when we see things as He sees things. So again you have to pray for a "seeing" eyes.

Logical in what way? Let me give u an example. When God throws in our way trials, what do you think is His purpose in doing so? Is it to hurt us? Knock us down? Punish us, perhaps? Of course not! Our God is a loving Father. His intention is not to make us suffer. Have you forgotten how He sent His beloved Son Jesus to suffer for us? See, that's how much He loves YOU.

So, what then is the purpose why you are going through all this pain? Simple, He wants you to remember His love.

Most of  the time, we humans, because of the busy life we live. The good job we have. The riches we amass. The new car, watch, house etc. we acquire.We Forget Him. We take credit for the Graces He gives. Like children, we go back to the I-as-the-center-of -the-universe attitude. In short, we displeases God. Thus, He sends us trials. To test us. To make us remember that everything is His. That we belong to Him.

He pokes us so we would remember that He is the Loving Father we can always run back to. All we need to do is to trust Him with all our heart, by offering our doubts, our fears, our troubles to Him, knowing deep well, that He has the best intention at heart.


ENDURE

Everybody can relate, that when the heat is on and life seems to offer no way out. We ask God to take us out of that situation. And when He does not immediately do so, like spoiled children, we start to entertain ill-feelings against Him. We start to feel UNLOVED. We start the series of whys starting from why me???

Some would even go as far as dare God. Dare Him. Push Him. As if it would anger Him more. Would it  really make Him angry? I dare say, No. God made us, so He knows our frailties. Do your own father hit you as soon as you cry because he did not allow you to watch TV during weekdays? I bet not. Instead, he would just give his irritant child a patient look and explain to him his rules. Just so with Our Heavenly Father.

God insists on our endurance. And there is no way to learn endurance than simply to endure. Why? Why do we have to endure? Because He wants us to discover His provision. Because He wants us to realize, that we have Him..and that in His Time, there will be deliverance.

God will make everything right, in His Time and in His Way. Just lean on him and learn of His ways.

 SUBMIT

People are control-freaks. We always want to have control in everything. We easily get irritated when we can't seem to handle the situation. In frustration, we look for ways to gain back control. We forgot a very elementary fact. Our lives  are not ours to control.

Certain things happen because it has to happen. What might take place may not be in our own liking. It might not even be in line with our plans or our visions. But this is certain, everything is God's will. So whether your hurt, your sick or you lost everything. Just Obey. Surrender to His plan. Transfer ownership of your burden to Him and simply Submit. Remember: Our hour of greatest need is His hour of greatest supply.


REJOICE

I had the world on my shoulders. How can I rejoice?

Haven't you heard me say LET GO?  Let God take the rein. Do not be anxious and be weighed down by your worries. When you fear the things that seems to steal your life away. When you say that you can't seem to know how to get by after losing something you think was worth your life. You are actually putting those things/persons in a higher pedestal than God who is the giver of  life. Don't you see the irony of it? That's what would anger God.

God promised us that His burden is light. Because Jesus is the burden-bearer. But we cannot experience His strength while we bear our burdens on our own strengths. We have to choose to let go of our burdens and let Jesus bear them. This is God's plan. This is how He wills it to happen. 

So let go of your will and let your heart and mind have peace. Let God's will be done.



-mcm



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Jurisprudential Quotes

>> 15 June 2013

Statistics never lie, but lovers often do.
- Antonio v. Reyes, G.R. No. 155800,  March 10, 2006


There is a right way to do the right thing at the right time and for the right reason.
-Santiago v. COMELEC


He who comes to equity must come with clean hands.
-De Garcia vs Santos, GR.L-1422, October 17, 1947


We cannot castigate a man for seeking out the partner of his dreams, for marriage is a sacred and perpetual bond which should be entered into because of love, not for any other reason. 
-Figueroa v. Barranco, Jr., SBC Case No. 519, July 31, 1997


Love happens to everyone. It is dubbed to be boundless as it goes beyond the expectations people tagged with it. In love, “age does matter.” People love in order to be secure that one will share his/her life with another and that he/she will not die alone. Individuals who are in love had the power to let love grow or let love die – it is a choice one had to face when love is not the love he/she expected.  
-Padilla-Rumbaua v. Rumbaua, G.R. No. 166738, August 14, 2009



Marital union is a two-way process. An expressive interest in each other's feelings at a time it is needed by the other can go a long way in deepening the marital relationship. Marriage is definitely not for children but for two consenting adults who view the relationship with love amor gignit amorem, respect, sacrifice and a continuing commitment to compromise, conscious of its value as a sublime social institution. 
-Chi Ming Tsoi v. Court of Appeals and Gina Lao- Tsoi,  GR No. 119190, January 16, 1997


In our criminal justice system, what is important is not whether the court entertains doubt about the innocence of the accused, since an open mind is willing to explore all possibilities, but whether it entertains a reasonable, lingering doubt as to his guilt.  For, it would be a serious mistake to send an innocent man to jail where such kind of doubt hangs on to one’s inner being, like a piece of meat lodged immovable between teeth.
- Antonio Lejano v. People GR.No. 176389


The law favors the mother if she is a fit and proper person to have custody of her children so that they may not only receive her attention, care, supervision but also have the advantage and benefit of a mother’s love and devotion for which there is no substitute. Generally, the love, solicitude and devotion of a mother cannot be replaced by another and are worth more to a child of tender years than all other things combined.
- Wilson Sy vs. Court of Appeals G.R. No. 124518

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El Alquimista @ 25

>> 13 June 2013

Lo and Behold!


Its my all-time favorite book's 25th anniversary!


Thank You, Paulo Coelho for The Alchemist.
I know it had changed a lot of people's perspectives on life as much as it had changed mine.


Continue being a blessing, Maestro!


Maktub!
El Alquimista

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Time and Life

Be careful with whatever preoccupies your mind. It may keep you from focusing on the more important things in life. To have doubts is okay. Don't freak out. You may just need to breathe for awhile. Try to take a step away. Think. Breathe. Pray. Take a look at the bigger picture. Give it time. Everything will fall back to its place.

BUT... if after meditating, you'd realize that you come to a dead end. Don't hesitate. Take Courage. Turn your back and walk forward. As I had said, Life is too short to be stuck on yesterdays. Don't be a worrier. Love is patient, love is kind.... it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, It Keeps NO Record of Wrongs.

This Happens. This is Normal. Don't think otherwise. 

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Live by Faith


God's prescription for our wisdom is to find His.

2 Corinthians 5:7

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Be Still.

Trials and pain are not ultimately harmful unless they diminish our relationship with God. 

Endure. Because Our God does not leave us in our troubles. He puts us there to discover His provision. Lean on Him and learn of His ways. 

Resist Flight.


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Halfway Home

memo-reminder

my personal space with the Child Christ Jesus  on top.

cupboard and lahat na..:)

books, memory aid

more books

where I do most of my research


A BAR-REVIEWEE Room

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Seems like the weather would be better today!.


Ayei! 

CARPE DIEM!


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>> 02 June 2013

All gifts, all power, all wisdom, all authority comes from above. When we take credit, we deny God's generosity. Everything we have is a gift. 

Reminder: All we have and all we are is by grace.


Have a blessed Monday. 


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